My new gay friend

For the last two months I have been visiting a local store several times a week and made friends with the kid at the front counter. We have openly talked about church, Jesus, his family, my family and life in LA! The first time I walked into the store I felt like I should share my testimony, which I did. I did so as conversation and was not confrontational. We talk about church and ministry every time I am there.

Here is the interesting part. The store is frequented by lots of beautiful women and last week I commented that it must drive him crazy. He looked me right in the eyes and said, “it does not bother me a bit, I’m gay” WHAT? For almost two months now I have been talking about church and he never once judged me. I was shocked. Not that he is gay, but that he was so cool.

We still talk about church, ministry, marketing and life in LA. He is a good kid and fun to talk to. He is also a great salesperson and besides genuinely befriending everyone he does an amazing job of upselling. Just because he is gay I didn’t start treating him any different and just because I am a Christian he never once treated me any different.

I don’t agree with his lifestyle yet I don’t have an agenda to “convert” him either. In fact, that is what is wrong with most Christians today. We point our finger condemning people as “sinners” which only continues to reinforce the tainted view people have of us, or we separate ourselves because we feel uncomfortable around people not exactly like us. Not just gays but homeless, handicapped, gutter punk kids and others.

In reality my new friend taught me a few very important lessons. Mainly to not judge people and allow them to be themselves. Although this sounds simple to most of us, me included, we have to fight past stereotypes and negative predispositions to truly love everyone. Too me, if Christians just started to be friendly instead of weird it would be a huge step in the right direction.

Tags: Church, Friends

This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 16th, 2008 at 8:32 am and is filed under Change, Character, Church, Life's Lessons. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

Gay Singles

Thank you for your help, posted this to twitter!
Understudy

Mark,

I am following the links you posted on facebook. I read the responses there and I have read these here. Everyone of them seems to have forgotten the tale of the good Samaritan.

Mark, you don't have to convert or save him. As matter of fact you can't. You made a choice 14 years ago to get sober. It was your choice not anyone else's choice.

Here in this group of comments you have responses that try to point out how wrong you are and how gays are like atheists. It is such a sad state of comments. Continue forward you have done so much good and are beginning to understand so much more. The gays, atheists, and liberals are just like the rest.

Friendship is a wonderful thing.
Fran

jsindorf wrote:
We’re about as dangerous as the Shriners. Just a bunch of kooky folks, being weird.

My response:
Judging by many of the reactions i see around me and in books and newspapers, I think more and more of the American Society views Christians as far more dangerous than "gays". That certainly seems to be true in Europe and in many recent atheistic books. The most famous being Richard Dawkins, the famous atheistic scientist from Britian, and arguably one of the most influential atheists of our time.

To be fair though, I think the perception of Christians being dangerous is actually a reaction to the horrendous actions of militant Muslims done in the name of Allah. Atheists and non-believers tend to brush all theists with the same brush.

Just a humble observation.
jsindorf

You just stated, very clearly, the difference between gays and Christ-followers.

Gays don't care about making you turn gay. They feel free to like you, sell to you... whatever, just as long as they are accepted and not pushed to the margins of society. Look at the design shows on TV that are overly populated by gays. Very seldom do you find one making a serious pass at a straight guy. In fact (like your friend) they are seen as cool.

Ever since Christ walked this earth those who named His name were outcasts. They were crucified, fed to lions, persecuted, hated, ridiculed and reviled.

Under those circumstances did the Church grow. Those were Christians whose beliefs were strong enough that they would hold them in the face of any enemy.

Today Christians are merely made fun of or ignored. We're only important every four years when a republican wants to become president. We're not hated and not cool. We're about as dangerous as the Shriners. Just a bunch of kooky folks, being weird.

I don't think our mission is to be liked or be seen as cool. I think we are supposed to be different. Light in the middle of darkness. Not being idiots, but being Christ.
Sarahllv

Mark says: "I don’t agree with his lifestyle yet I don’t have an agenda to “convert” him either. In fact, that is what is wrong with most

Christians today".

I have to respectfully disagree. The ENTIRE reason Jesus hung out with the "outcasts"... the "lost"... was to SAVE them. To "convert"

them if you will. Jesus didn't come to earth for the healthy, but He came for the sick. The lost. Who are the lost? Anyone headed to

hell. God doesn't want anyone to be lost, for anyone to go to hell. And He backed that up with action... and not just words... by

sacrificing His only begotten Son on the cross. That's how seriously God loves anyone who is lost... for anyone headed toward hell.

What no Christian should ever lose sight of is that sin... all sins... separates humans from God. All sins send people to hell. Every

sin was enough to send Jesus to the cross to die a horrible and humiliating death for us, so that we didn't need to. All sin grieves God

and brings unspeakable sorrow and anguish to God.

So while I agree that we shouldn't arrogantly and arbitrarily and egostically and hypocritically condemn others for their sins, we should

be aware that without Christ, this new gay friend of Mark's will end up in hell. JUST LIKE WHERE WE ALL WERE HEADED before we were saved

through Christ. It's not a pleasant thought, but we can't ignore the reality of hell if we care about the lost in this world. What then

should we do? We should Cry. We should Pray. We should petition God day and night that this new friend will receive Christ and be

saved.

They say that action speaks louder than words. Well then, who (if they were in Mark's place) are willing to pray unceasingly for this

young man's salvation? Who is willing to cry for him? Who is willing to beseach and plead and petition God on behalf of this young man?

Should our only action consist of being nice? Shouldn't we also pray unceasingly for this young man? If we really want to be radical for

Christ and make a difference, we should be doing both. Just like Jesus did.